Wednesday, March 4th
To complete today's challenge, find time to prayerfully read through the reflections below, attend a recovery meeting, and share what's on your heart and mind on today's discussion board.
REFLECT
After reading today's reflections, make sure to listen to Brother John's personal reflection.
Memorial of Saint Bonaventure, Bishop & Doctor of the Church
Today is the memorial of Saint Bonaventure, Bishop and Doctor of the Church, who wrote much on the intermingling of philosophy and theology, of reason and faith, and of head and heart in relationship with God. And this is what most speaks to me about my recovery journey.
I came into the Church as an adult. Looking back, it is quite clear that I was intellectually converted. I found the Church’s explanation of life, the universe, and everything else quite compelling. But the lack of a deeper conversion is now obvious in hindsight. I was hopelessly sunk in the quagmire of my addictions, and despite the intermittent periods of clarity when I knew that my life was disordered (to put it mildly), I could never seem to conquer my compulsions. Predictably, my spiritual life was haphazard, inconstant, scandalous, and lukewarm at best. Often I despaired and rejected God outright in my foolish anger. I was all head and no heart, and my relationship with Christ was exceedingly immature and unhappy.
The key to a deeper conversion has been Catholic in Recovery. What this ministry revealed to me is that my conversion was incomplete, that at the root of my addictions was a deep and pernicious pride that had rendered my heart black with distrust and fear, from which was born my compulsions to cope with the pain. Most amazingly, I learned that my self-pity was in fact the most insidious form of pride of all. My self-pity was the wall I had erected against God and neighbor, and it was the accelerant always fanning the fire of my compulsions anew. It was literally my spiritual coffin, and I chose to lie in it for far too long.
Happily, by following the path of 12-step recovery and experiencing the honesty, openness, and willingness of others in CIR fellowship, I have literally been spiritually raised from the dead. Within me, at last, is a real integration of head and heart, of total surrender (Step One), and the realization that from within my utter powerlessness comes His wonderful and amazing power. And the proof is in the pudding—my compulsions have been lifted and in its place is a daily yearning to be with Christ in prayer, adoration, and the sacraments. At last, I am on the path to loving God and neighbor with head and heart.
Saint Bonaventure, pray for us!
Reflection Questions
- Consider how recovery has been a path of conversion for you. What have you discovered to be the barriers blocking the light and love of the Lord in your heart?
- An essential truth in recovery is that resentment is fatal to sobriety. Consider your resentments. How do they contribute to fanning the flames of disordered desires, unhealthy attachments, and outright addictions in your life?
Daily Mass Readings
First Reading: Isaiah 10:5-7, 13b-16
Responsorial Psalm: Psalm 94:5-6, 7-8, 9-10, 14-15
Gospel: Matthew 11:25-27
Reflection by Pete S.
Saint Bonaventure, Bishop and Doctor of the Church
(1221-1274) — The Doctor Seraphicus, or the Seraphic Doctor, was cured from a disease in childhood by the prayers of Saint Francis of Assisi, and he joined the new Franciscan order in his early twenties in his native Italy. He studied and taught theology and philosophy in Paris, where he became friends with Saint Thomas Aquinas and Saint Louis IX, King of France. Bonaventure carefully collected documents and interviews of Saint Francis and wrote the official biography. He also wrote commentaries on the scriptures and textbooks for philosophy and theology, earning him the title of Doctor of the Church.
Teaching was one of Saint Bonaventure’s great charisms, a gift that helps build others and the Church. While we don’t all have the expertise to be a Doctor of the Church, any person with experience in the Twelve Steps can help accompany another where they have been themselves. This is a gift both for sponsor and sponsee. What is your relationship to sponsorship?
“When we pray, the voice of the heart must be heard more than that proceeding from the mouth” (Saint Bonaventure).
Reflection by Brad Farmer
Other Saints
Discuss
Share your thoughts and connect with others on this journey.
Brother John shares about the fruitlessness of sacrifice and suffering, despite not always being willing to accept them when he was younger. How has accepting suffering and sacrifice in your own life been fruitful in your faith and recovery?
Log in to join the discussion.
I do not recall a time when God did not give me what I asked for. It seems to me that God has always been very good to me giving me exactly what I have needed (mostly in meditation/prayers/homilies) when I needed it for positive inspiration and reflection. Sobriety was a longer process, but after years of binge drinking when it became daily to the point of desperation he again put in line exactly the people I needed to come into recovery.