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My name is Martha. I am in Lakewood, California. That is a city close to Long Beach in Southern California. I’ve been here my entire life except for a short time in Sacramento when I was 7. I loved reading the other posts and can identify with those thoughts and feelings. I am a nurse and have been for 43 years. I recently semi-retired and hope to be out of the hospital setting by the end of the year. I also teach online, which keeps me involved in healthcare. I am also a cradle Catholic, but went to all public schools so I grew up in the CCD world of religious education and the strong faith of my grandmother. I have also played the violin since childhood and play in a community orchestra. I have been in 12 step programs for 21 years but never really felt comfortable in meetings. The Catholic bashing really bothers me, as well as the profanity. I left meetings a couple months ago and found CIR. I’m glad I did. I have been to a couple of meetings and plan to attend regularly. I’m glad to see there is a workbook coming and will be getting that. I hope to be able to really find a way to use the 12 steps in true alignment with my Catholic faith. I feel drawn to finding a deeper faith. I love my parish and am involved with ministries there. My struggle has been with addictions of family members and my own struggles with food. I would really like to work the 12 steps within my faith with others who feel the same way. To me, that is fellowship. I hope to find that here. I too feel isolated and alone, but I feel more hopeful now.